Stronger than everything

Life is a great cycle, it is extraordinary, bigger than we imagine it. Even when we close ourselves in fear and distrust, she always gives us a new chance. We must never forget it ». Susanna Tamaro every time she speaks weighs the words but has the gift of going straight to the heart of things. Perhaps this is the secret that has made her one of the most loved writers in Italy and also in the world. His latest book entitled A great love story is an invitation to start from the fundamentals, from that challenge of relationships that never go downhill that however gives meaning to life. The story is that of the meeting between Andrea and Edith, he is very rigorous, she is a slightly transgressive young woman. Through them, Susanna makes us understand how life should never be idealized, but welcomed even when it hurts, because love does not follow the logic of two hearts and a hut. "That's right. If there is one devastating thing about our age it is mass sentimentalization, which has now become a paradigm. It is impressive to see certain American films filled with so many "I love you". In reality, things are different. We don't get to say "I love you" or "I love you" in 30 seconds. Much more often we are unable to build a relationship on a deeper level, to accept a dimension made up of lights and shadows».

Do Andrea and Edith do it?
«They try. They are two characters who have understood that love is beautiful when there is diversity. In this perspective, a conflictual dialogue also has value but accepts to grow over time. Edith is the image of the restlessness of modernity and post-modernity: a girl with no roots and no emotional stability behind her. Andrea, on the other hand, is a more traditional figure, the classic man with his head on his shoulders, with a virility understood not as power, but as stability».

Once again, his interest is to investigate the human soul. Where does this passion come from?
«I believe that this is the task of literature. We live in a time that tends to exalt superficiality. I still believe that a book, through the essentiality of the word, can help us re-enter humanity, to get to know each other better, to grasp new aspects of the journey, of our relationships. I wrote A Great Love Story for this very reason».

The book is a hymn to life, published in a very difficult moment ...
«Yes, I wanted to remember that in life we ​​can discover an energy that is much stronger than ourselves, capable of taking us to unexpected places, taking root in the hope that things can really change. We must have faith in life, because only there can we find the good that escapes our eyes. If we cultivate it, we will change our gaze and live in a different way».

It is not easy to do this when so many people suffer and die or when we have to give up our relationships because we are confined to the house. The pandemic is doing this ...
«Certainly. I hope that this extraordinary crisis makes us understand that we must take back our humanity, the bases of our existence. I think of when I took the bus before Covid: no one spoke, no one looked into each other's eyes, everyone was somewhere else. Instead, life is here now. We are made to get involved in relationships, even the immediate ones. We must reflect on this».

What can we learn from this experience? How should the new world be?
«Without a doubt, Covid has stripped us of useless things. In the last 30 years we have experienced an incredible acceleration in the field of work, progress, technology. All important things that have also altered our relationship with life. We are first of all human beings, children of an anthropology rooted in thousands of years of history and evolution. I believe that we will be better if we return to be masters of the profound meaning of things».

Which?
«For example, deciding not to consume and communicate compulsively, but to put positive relationships and love back at the center. If you don't live like this, it's easy to get overwhelmed by fears, anxiety, panic. At the same time, we must make peace with our limitations and also with death. We had removed it, it was the biggest taboo. We thought we were untouchable, as if the experience of illness and death did not concern us. The virus reminded us that this is not the case. We are physically fragile and our idea of ​​omnipotence has revealed itself for what it is: fake».

How can you change direction?
«We must witness the miracle of life, making sure that the little daily deaths do not have the upper hand over our days. It means bringing back to the center the idea that we should not consume relationships, but build relationships. Live them, treat them, keep them. Just like in a couple. Either you struggle in diversity to welcome the other, or you live relationships of abuse. And at that point one of the two succumbs. We must train, grow even through falls, but the goal must be clear: starting from our relationships to build a more just, more human world. A less dehumanized and selfish world already begins with us».

Matteo Spicuglia
NP december 2020