It was 11.45 pm
Publish date 10-02-2021
At 11.45 pm (perhaps) on Saturday 24 October Arianna, our second daughter, was born. The most malicious will justify the indicative time of her birth with the signature of her father on the article. In reality, uncertainty is a fact.
We entered the ER at 11.15 pm (really), the rest of the time was almost enough for gynecologists, nurses and midwives to set up the delivery room. A few moments after entering Arianna's world, a voice bursts into the room: "Birth time?". The large number of people in that room seems to be the reason why no one responds.
They call it the spectator effect, a phenomenon of social psychology for which the probability of intervention is inversely related to the number of spectators. At one point, the eldest of the group replies: «It was 11.45 pm». He says it with the same firmness with which I answer the question "What did you eat for dinner last night?".
Arianna's race for life was already fully planned. On Sunday morning the pre-hospitalization and on Monday the long-awaited caesarean section, recommended by the experts, given our circumstances. We had everything planned: holidays at work, frozen lunches, hospital visiting hours and the travel of our eldest daughter Margherita with the help of grandparents and friends. All trashed. The many chatter, the many thoughts to feel ourselves in our ideal comfort zone, swept away in a few moments: Arianna was born before all our programs, and without a caesarean. Life has brought us back to the essential as always. To the Word of God. «Look at the birds of the sky: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Don't you perhaps count more than them?» (Mt 6:26) .
Arianna was born at the time of Covid, Arianna was born at the time when the layoffs were slow to arrive, Arianna was born at the time when hospital admissions are limited. Arianna was born. And we, once again, have learned that Love has already won!
In this period we live the fatigue of not being able to simply open the door of the house to grandparents, friends and relatives who would have come to visit us to share this moment of joy with us. Being a parent is a gift but living it every day is a real challenge.
Arianna's arrival in our family is once again teaching us the value of the Presence. The simplest daily activity is mixed with a puppy of a human being who looks at you, smiles, cries, screams and tries to satisfy their basic needs in any way. But which of us was ready to change habits again? Who had the desire to catapult themselves into different balances? Despite the nine months of pregnancy, essential for getting into a new routine, we weren't.
A dear friend often reminds us that the true Christian does not ask himself what is missing in life but what he can still give. At that moment the heart expands, the space is created to truly welcome a new life that gives us new life!
Today we still have questions and fears that accompany us: will we be able to raise our daughters? Will we be able to make them citizens of the world? Will we be able to transmit to her what are the values of life for us? Can a man survive at home with three women (oops…)? We keep our questions close, waiting to find a piece of step by step answer, convinced more than ever that the road opens with walking.
Chiara and Shaquille
NP December 2020