I suck myself

I suck. Who hasn't said it before? If anything, there is something to worry about for those who have never recognized it. The ancient Fathers of the Church, as refined psychologists trained in introspection and silence, rejoiced over whoever uttered such a phrase: for them, face to face with one's own misery can be painful, but it is the only dynamism capable of revitalize the stagnant life of a soul.

It is a creative force of new life. Abba Poemen said: "At the same moment in which man, dejected, says: I have sinned, paf, everything is over". And John Chrysostom: «Have you sinned? Tell God: I have sinned. How hard is it to say?" As soon as repentance appears with an admission of guilt, the reparation of what sin has destroyed instantly begins. God, listening at the door of the heart, is always ready to forgive and raise up those who have stumbled. Anyone: "Every age needs penance, the young to escape the passion that comes, the old to change their bad habits," says Giovanni Mosco. But repentance, metanoein, is only one step.

Sometimes short, sometimes long and tiring, but always with a beginning and an end. The next feeling, on the other hand, is more complex, it is an inner state that lasts a lifetime, which the Fathers call penthos. The penthos no longer refers to a single act: on the contrary, when the evil done has been forgiven, it is a sin to remember it again, because scruple kills hope and makes one forget the immensity of mercy, says Mark the Ascetic.

While repentance pertains only to yourself, the penthos weeps over the sins of all mankind, past, present, and future. The penthos is the love of God penetrated into the heart with forgiveness, which becomes love for all and pain for the evil of all.

In Greek mythology, when Zeus assigns tasks to the various gods, the only one absent is Penthos. When he arrives, he receives the only task that no one had wanted: pain and sadness. That there must be: suppressing them, as our culture tries to do today, can have serious consequences on human psychology. But Penthos doesn't want to torment anyone: since the pain exists, he consoles those who cry in pain for a lost love. When the Gospel came into contact with Greek culture, the first Christians were impressed by how the life of the Spirit was enriched, sown on new ground.

The Greek penthos became the term for "mourning that generates joy", the cry of consolation and gratitude for forgiveness and inner peace, while the heart cannot stop suffering for the evil that afflicts the world. For the ancient monks, the sign of penthos is the "gift of tears": the "second baptism" that opens the door of the heart and makes the relationship with God and with everyone more intimate and close. Without tears, they said, there is no transformation. Only a face washed by the tears of penthos reflects the immortal beauty of longing for God.


Flaminia Morandi
NP August / September 2022