Between the apocalypse and the void

From many quarters we hear the anguished consideration repeated: "But was it not enough to have been completely paralyzed by the pandemic for two years, for now the tremendous concern, the agony of the war between Russia and Ukraine, was added?". A hard, difficult question, which is certainly not a real question (since there cannot be answers), but instead has the flavor of a cry of despair. War is and will always remain the example of absolute evil, of blind destruction, of death.

Illness also evokes the concrete possibility of the end of life. In both cases, we know very well, therefore, that we are talking about possible roads with no return, about ways with no safe outlets, about a time without a guaranteed future. These are certainly "extraordinary" events, that is, they really seem to take place in a world, in a sphere that is far beyond our ordinary daily lives, made up of habits, simple, repetitive actions, in short, normal routines. But traumatic experiences - even when they do not involve us immediately and directly in the first person - have precisely the power to make us suddenly perceive the "extraordinary" as real, close and possible. Our mind constantly oscillates between the stability of the image of everyday personal life (work, home, school ...) and the unexpected appearance of the catastrophic images of war that continually reach our eyes from every means of communication. .

Sometimes the alternation of such different and contrasting images is so rapid that it seems absurd, surreal, like the sudden appearance of an advertisement for a beauty product or a luxury car in the middle of a a television program that is bringing into our homes faces destroyed by grief and no more tears, injured without help, mass graves, rocket launches, columns of smoke and tanks devastated by flames. How do you go instantly from horror to banality, without feeling stunned? How do you pass in a few seconds from a state of mind full of anguish and horror to one that should be based on serenity or at least on normality? Is it right to be catapulted by a bitter reflection that arose in front of an apocalyptic scenario to a feeling of total emptiness? Yet they are two levels that coexist in our days and their coexistence often frightens us. Is it possible to find a minimum of equilibrium between many stresses of diametrically opposite sign?

It is not easy, as evidenced by the many reports of children, young people and even adults who are definitely ill, suffer from illnesses and symptoms of all kinds, without actually being diagnosed with diseases of any kind. «I really don't know what to say ... I have no more words, I can't find them in my head anymore ... there are just so many thoughts that I don't understand. And they come and go without my being able to stop them "(Sofia, 13). «At night I wake up many times and listen ... I try to hear if there are any strange noises, which I have never heard. Sometimes it seems to me that something explodes from afar and then I am so afraid ”(Matthew, 7 years old). «My mother turns the television on and off all day, I don't know if she really watches it or not, maybe she is looking for news that is not there» (Davide, 5 and a half years old). "When the bombs come we will run away to the cellar, but I'm afraid there are rats!" (Annalisa, 3 years old). “I can't stay in school and study poetry or do the English exercises or whatever… and yet I am. What do I need it for? I don't know what there will be for us tomorrow ... I'm so afraid »(Martina, 15 years old).

It is not easy, but we must find together the healthiest way to stay in touch with the whole of reality, with the awareness of tragedies and with being rooted in what every day can still give us security. Fear is fought with the weapons we carry in our hearts.


Gabriella Delpero
NP May 2022