A difficult return

At first it seemed to me a hasty consideration and without too much foundation, but over the weeks I found more than one confirmation: some of our boys did not at all like going back to school in the presence, nor being able to leave the house again and meet peers in person, nor the no longer being obliged to wear a mask outdoors, nor many other opportunities, signs of a gradual (although necessarily prudent) return to pre-Covid lifestyle habits. How is it possible? Yet for months it seemed they had wanted nothing else or at least nothing else was talked about, at all levels ... Instead for some, the recent quasi-return to normality was decidedly difficult, tiring, and brought out in all the others more than a question mark.

But then the pandemic, with the restrictions of interpersonal contacts, has really changed us "inside" so much that we have forgotten how do you stay out there?
Has it changed us so profoundly that we don't even want to leave our house-refuge-prison anymore?
Is it therefore too risky to try to abandon that state of precariousness, loneliness and uncertainty in which we have been plunged for a time that seemed infinite to us? In fact, a boy who in recent months successfully attended the eighth grade, after having stayed at home for whole weeks (justified by his parents and tacitly approved by the teachers) to prepare in the most detailed way the written essay to take to the license exam, on the day of the exam he did not really go to the commission, confessing that he absolutely could not leave the reassuring home environment and that he felt terrified by the idea of ​​exposing himself to the infection by sitting in front of a group of adults in charge of asking him questions.

Too dangerous, in short, and in all respects. Better to let it go.
And the mask? Too dangerous to take it out in the open? For some very young people it could perhaps be hypothesized that in recent months wearing the mask has been liberating, almost a way to feel more "equal", to avoid too direct gazes, not to perceive the eyes of the big ones pointed in their own, to feel more inaccessible and therefore more defended. And of course, for those who had difficulty in relating with her peers, the mask certainly gave the possibility to hide every expression of the face, to conceal every emotion and feeling in the best possible way. Not to mention distance learning, which for some has suddenly represented a "solution", a real panacea, being part of a class without having to go to school, see and (if you want) not be seen, pretend to participate and be able to think about other, or participate without giving it to understand, speak or be silent, be there or not ... How many unexpected possibilities of withdrawal, of estrangement from an environment that is felt to be difficult or of denial of one's own personal relationship problems with one's neighbor! So many ways to send messages to the world you are part of, like waving a flag to claim something, to point out that there is an important need. These messages must be recognized, collected and taken seriously. In this way we can try together to deal with ourselves, with our own uncertainties, with our fears, to get to know each other a little better, a little deeper. To restore a sufficient balance and then try to come out all in the open, as it is. And take back the life out there.

Gabriella Delpero
NP August / September 2021