Emotions, emoticons

Emotions, emoticons. Emotions. From TikTok to advertising images, everyone is looking for emotions and people who are capable of arousing emotions are loved. But emotions are only indicators: of feelings and thoughts that remain ignored, covered by the illusory blanket of emotions. As if only the symptoms of an illness were treated, without going to see what's underneath. We prefer not to look, for fear of seeing. Like children who watch a cartoon and close their eyes to a scary scene. We are completely fooled by the "three great foreign giants" of which Saint Mark the Ascetic speaks: oblivion, negligence and ignorance. In one word: unawareness.

"Be the gatekeeper of your heart so that the stranger does not enter", said the desert fathers also called neptics, that is, those "attentive" to the movements of the heart. Evagrius added: without attention there is no prayer. Because "spiritual" life, an overused term, is nothing other than becoming aware of what the Spirit works within us. Conscience is like a black box, said Silvano Fausti, which records 24 hours a day what has happened within us, but the deep feelings, the hidden ones, the ones that are not recognised, then give rise to the evil actions that we call sins: «Numerous passions they are hidden in our soul – said Saint Maximus the Confessor – if they escape us they will be revealed to us by our temptations." Yet we have the old examination of conscience available: which is an authentic biblical prayer, because it recalls God's action within me.

Sacred Scripture did not end two thousand years ago: God continues to write a piece of sacred history in me: if, by examining my conscience, I remember his gifts. And if I give thanks for what I receive, I also do the Eucharist! And maybe, exam after exam, I'll even convert! And little by little my life becomes "spiritual", that is, capable of contemplating God's action in me, his presence. Because I can do a very intense meditation in a "carnal" way, just to inflate my "self" and slam some more mortar on my monument. Or I can have fun in a “spiritual” way. “Spiritual” is just doing things with the Spirit of God: which is love, joy, peace, generosity, benevolence, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. This time Saint Paul is very clear.

The examination of conscience is done with God's style: starting with the good things that happened to me during the day. And only those, for a month and a little more, to become aware of the harmony and peace that accompanies God's gifts, observing the feelings and thoughts they aroused in me. Then, later, I will look in the black box for obstacles, that is, all the times that feelings and thoughts do not agree with the harmony and peace of divine gifts. Thus, says Saint John Cassian, we slowly become like the centurion of Mt 8.9: «We will have the power and strength to say to bad suggestions: Go away! And to the good ones: Come! And they will come." This is the “daily bread”, the “supersubstantial bread”, “the nourishing bread” that we ask to eat every day, says Origen. The bread that transforms us into the spiritual "Great Eden" where the Lord can't wait to walk.


Flaminia Morandi
NP March 2024