Farewell to the Patriarchate

I'm increasingly wondering how we can talk about certain topics without offending someone. We all have a sore point. That thing we can't talk about! Don't be offended, but for a few months now, for example, I've been a bit intolerant of the word "patriarchy." It's often discussed at our dinner table with our children and friends. It might be a coincidence, but in those moments I'm always washing the dishes and emptying the dishwasher, or setting the table after having previously set it. It's not uncommon for me to get yelled at for not having put out napkins while I'm doing it! Of course, I also have my fair share of manly tasks, like assembling shelves, which will soon fall (but that's another story). Patriarchy is also discussed on the radio while I hang out the laundry and ponder the future of my wife and children. My daughter often tells me, "You can't understand what we women go through. You don't ride the tram while men disrespect you in every way possible..." I belong to that category of men, like many of my partners, whose grandfather always said, "Don't even touch women with a rose."

And I was raised primarily by my grandmother, aunt, and mother. Given the choice, I've always preferred the company of the female gender. When I hear about the horrible things men sometimes do to women, I feel very ashamed and can't understand where these people come from. What kind of grandfathers and fathers did these people have? Where did something go wrong? Dear patriarchy, there's no word further from me. So, sorry, but I can't stand you. From now on, I'll call you "Poor Things."


Andrea Gotico
NP June/July 2025